How can one let three years past without documenting through such a creative output like writing on ones blog. My pepsicles wow hasn't time just flown past, it seems the more the years progress in this life the quicker time can just pass on by. I suppose we all get focused on these busy, full lives that we have created. However self-reflection and introspection are a must for us to gather the lessons that we have been given and hopefully taken on to learn. For this I must confess, I have lapsed considerably in the creative pursuits these last few years. I think that can often happen when you feel you are often putting out fires. Though that is not an excuse just a reflection and a reminder that no matter what is going on in life allowing yourself 1 hour a week for an creative outlet leads to greater emotional health.
So here I am rewriting the flawed choice I made three years ago to stop writing in this blog. This is the ride of life darlings, experienced through my eyes, heart and soul. What a roller-coaster ride it has been. For those of you who know me this is just what you expect I suppose, though it seems to regularly shock me how much I have and can manifest the roller ride into my life. I would think I would be use to it by now, but hey I don't claim to the sharpest tool in the shed. I must confess that this has come on the heels of a dear friend of my Jen making a comment that if I wrote a blog then she would be the first one to sign up as she feels she gains quite a bit from the chats that we have. That then got me thinking about this old thing that I had left behind, so I decided to dust off my blog typing fingers and access the wisdom, intuition, stories, experiences and continuously evolving thought paradigm and start once again.
The question I often start with is what the hell to write about, especially as these pages have been dormant for rather a long period of time. Then again it always comes, whatever is building up inside of me that requires an outlet eventually comes to the surface if I ramble enough. Maybe this is the rambling part and the inspiration will come to the surface in a wave of pulsating energy, crying out to be put fourth from these fingers. Or maybe just maybe this will be the introduction only.
What is rather new for me is that I started this course called 'The relationship solution' put together by two amazingly shinning souls Gay and Kathlyn Hendricks. My husband came across their book 'Conscious Loving' some three to four years ago. Once he read it and raved about it I took to devouring the pages. Since we both agree and treasure all that they have to teach I thought it was about time that I true took to the task of improving my marriage and other bonded relationships in my life. Therefore I started their 6 weeks course last week and have already had some profound realisations. The first week is all about Commitment, yes that word that can cause some of us to sweat profusely. What they have you do is look at all the areas that you find conflict in your relationship, those that you are dissatisfied with and points of contention. Once you have identified those then they take you through the thought paradigm of 100% responsibility. That if you can just for a minute consider that all these points of contention and negative experiences are because you made these unconscious commitments how every long ago to manifest these experiences into your life. Now that might sound crazy to some, but if you take a minute it really ponder this you might glimpse the wisdom in this way of thinking.
Let me give you a personal example, I have had an abandonment trigger for many years and irrespective of the reason for this I have seemingly manifested this experience in my life over and over again. When something seems to happen to you often, it is safe to say the common denominator is you. Now going by this new way of thinking this would mean that I made an unconscious commitment years ago to commit to abandonment. Now the reason isn't that important why I did this, this important part is realising. The awareness then brings about the power to change this unconscious commitment into another conscious commitment. The power is claiming the unconscious part and then consciously making a new one, one that you feel inspired to bring into your life. What a powerful but simple tool!
We've all heard the old chestnut that opposites attract, and I must say that I have first hand experience with this. Then we spend a lot of time trying to change this partner into somebody more like us. Instead of appreciating all the things that this seemingly opposite person has to teach us. That the strengths that we were attracted to in them are the areas that we ourselves need to round and strengthen in ourselves. Enabling us to remember our wholeness, that we don't lack in any area, we just some need to place more attention in cultivating what is already there. Instead of looking outside of ourselves to feel whole.
Once we reclaim these unconscious commitments and recognise that those traits that we once loved and now possibly find irritating in our partner are exactly what we require to further our own remembrance and development, a new light shines into our lives and relationship. Instead of seeing all that is wrong and continuing to participate in the same old drama, we turn inwards and ask what unconscious commitment did I make, how can I once again see the gift that this persons differences bring to my own development and what new commitment do I want to make to bring about harmony and joy in my life.
I documented 31 unconscious commitments that I became aware of and realised that I attracted just the right partner to bring all of these to light. What an amazing gift to give myself, the opportunities have been right in front of me all this time, disguised in what I thought was only the other person's issues. Now viewing the problems in my marriage this way I am able to approach them with curiosity knowing that I am gathering the tools to make profound shifts in my life of the heart. I now greatly appreciate that my husband is less social then I am, as it's a chance for me to learn from him how to find comfort and joy in being alone. That his ability to be stubborn or focused depending on how you see it, is a learning lab for me to practise cultivating increased focus. His ability to walk away from most situations isn't abandonment it's a chance for me to learn how to give myself space when I need it and the list just goes on and on. Changing the unconscious commitments I made gives me the power to create a new what it is now I want in my experience. 100 % responsibility is scary at times I can't lie, but it brings freedom of the mind just that little bit closer and allows my nervous system to regulate, calm down and breathe. Along with enhancing my marriage and other relationships. My soul has been crying out for change, my life has been presenting me the tools and truly heartbreaking nudges and now I am embracing all that is being presented for my expansion and growth.
Here's to another type of roller-coaster ride filled with adventure, fun and excitement that lights my soul and those of you who share this with me.
Many blessings on your path.
The Relationship Solution, A Life-Changing Course From The World's Leading Relationship Experts
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